Part III: GOD AT THE HEART OF OUR CREATUREHOOD

16. Finding a rhythm in life

While waiting to die, we must live. But in the end, life is mortal. The crazy rhythm of everyday living is literally killing. Have we lost the secret of rest? Who is going to teach us what real peace and real rest is?

"I will give you rest." It's really strange: in this world of recreation, unemployment or retirement, one thing alone seems to be missing, and that is true rest! I'm not speaking here of relaxation, nor even of sleep, but of real repose, of that feeling of plenitude: of serene joy and of peace. I'd like to say a word about calm and happiness. Not only do people not rest, but to rest takes on a negative meaning, and is criticised and even forbidden as something profoundly immoral. Letting off steam is at times excusable, but to indulge in real repose and to indulge in it deliberately, is regarded as perverse. One has only to listen to the litany of blame: "When millions of children are dying of hunger; when there are plagues like torture and cancer, we have no right to be happy, nor to fold our arms and rest; we must be up and doing! The poor must everywhere wake up and learn how to read and count (especially to count)!; they must learn what their rights are and insist that they be respected. We must together invent an economy which will include everyone and give work to all! Research and techniques must be developed. All this is possible and it is urgent! Consequently, delay is to be deplored and repose forbidden." We must, we must, we must...

And to the collective "musts" individual obligations are added: each one must develop his/her personal gifts. We must learn how to express ourselves, in the theatre, in poetry, in dance or in singing. Each one must take stock of his own limitations, and surpass them until he literally "explodes"! and what do you think of the recent media debate? Inform yourself! In order to be a good citizen, you must go beyond the slogan threshold! You must, you must, you must... Even the unemployed, the retired or the beggar can find work, but work that is backbreaking, unworthy and inhuman.

Never, since our society has become frankly materialistic, has it been so weak in its forward march. It is as though a vacuum was created that had to be filled. Rapid progress is being made, but at the same time, man is discovering that his efforts are endless. Researches mean more researches, and discoveries mean more discoveries. His limitations are lessened, but he remains dissatisfied - even if he makes it to a better job - and he is totally frustrated because of the majority who cannot reach the coveted goal.

The experience that we have, both personally and collectively, is that of failure, which is tearing at the roots of our being and creating a gap between what we are and what we ought to be. We constantly want to have more, to be able to do more, to know more, to bridge the gap that separates us from ourselves, to fill in the ravine that separates us from our ideal. But the ravine moves along with us! Sometimes, it becomes so wide as to cause dizziness in certain people. They become wan, empty and depressive, in revolt against their mediocrity. So the number of failed beings increases, disqualified as they are from achieving their own potential. As models of sanctity proposed to them are inaccessible, they feel like lost souls, unworthy of the final reconciliation, unworthy of rest.

So then, to get away from megalomania and discouragement, I'm going to propose a parable, and to change the scene somewhat, I'm borrowing it from a different cultural background.

It seems that in order to complete the famous wall of China, the builders put forward an extraordinary piece of strategy. They built a tower and linked that to the preceding one, building the wall by starting at the end. Thus by successive and limited stages, they steadily advanced without becoming discouraged. Each block they had built, had a certain unity in itself, a certain perfection. Each link prefigured the whole and provided proportional satisfaction.

Likewise we might put rhythm into our lives, and take time off to breathe. Each one of our actions, inspired by the ultimate goal, would become like a sacrament. With a sprinkling of poetry, the smallest of our acts would be enriched in meaning and in liberty, and would become a prayer of praise and celebration. Work would become a game, shot through already with the great feast in preparation. And the final reward would be the same for all. What a surprise!

This of course presupposes that we change our ways of behaviour. In the Gospel, the widow's mite is of greater value than the superfluous money of a rich man, for quantity means nothing if it is not the expression of the gift of oneself. The joy of finding one sheep is multiplied a hundredfold, for all are found in the one which had gone astray and was found. Jesus turns it all upside down. He is glad to work precisely on the day of rest. He places sinners at the centre of redemption. Prostitutes and tax officials see Him approach them without any preliminary talk about repentance. He forgives them without asking for an admission of guilt.

Finally, whatever the sermons have to say, Jesus is not an unsurpassable model. He is not the "Superman" who has exceeded all humanity's limitations, nor the superman we dream of becoming, and who will return to pass judgement on our half-heartedness. Jesus is like us, a being of flesh and blood, circumscribed by time and space, a limited, sexual, mortal being. He knew the meaning of hunger and thirst, fatigue and anguish, sorrow and fear. Each of us has travelled further than He has. He did not invent the potato nor cross-fertilisation nor penicillin nor vaccination. If He healed a few sick people and took up the cause of some marginalised, it wasn't a lot. His life did not achieve any major success. He was born on straw and nailed to a cross, but others have undergone more suffering and were poorer than He was. The manger is not the depth of deprivation, nor Golgotha the culminating point of pain. Jesus was killed in a relatively proper way, with the opportunity of dying for what He believed.

He escapes nothing of our ordinary life, not even that sense of social culpability that we all feel on seeing the conditions in which so many have to live. He never did anything evil, yet children were massacred because of Him, and He escaped the massacre of those innocents.

No, Jesus is not the material summit of humanity, and for that reason He is unique, irreplaceable, unequalled! We all look for God in extremes, beyond our limitations. It is the idol we dream about, and about which I spoke earlier on. But Jesus is intensely human. He causes God to be present in the bread and butter situations of our lives; at the heart of our most humble occupations, and without upsetting us or forcing us in any way. It is in weakness that His power is most palpable!

Man's misfortune and his fundamental error, is to wish to become God through power and affirmation of his ego. Jesus shows us how to become human in a modest way, and to take on those divine qualities in a filial relationship born of joy and the Spirit's free gift. He did not change the world, but reconciled man with his mortal and limited condition. He invites us to rid ourselves of our imaginary burdens, in order to enter into the true repose and serenity of our God.